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Wednesday, January 15, 2014

What's different? Why now?

The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.

As I keep reflecting on the fact that it has almost been a year since I began this adventure to change my life, I either get asked or think about some of these questions often.  

Why did you think you would be successful?

Well, to be honest, I wasn't 100% sure I would be.  I just knew I needed to try something different and make a serious effort to get my life, my health, under control.  Remember, in my mind, this originally was just about weight loss.  I mean, I was good with everything else, right?  Ummmm....NO.  And, as I've said before, I think Renee' knew a little of that before I even met her.  But, even after I met with her, I was still really focused on the weight loss aspect.  Much as I said I was willing to start doing research on other things, I did my best to avoid it at first.  Change is hard for me.  Okay, it's hard for a lot of people.  For me, it's like going to a foreign country.  At this time last year, asking me to do anything out of my comfort zone would have sparked serious anxiety in me in so many ways I probably would have freaked out and cried.  Very quickly Renee' figured out that it was going to take awhile to get me to do a lot of things.  She could see that about me so fast, it made me trust her even more right away.  Well, and once she realized how little I knew about food and the grocery store, I think she realized how slow things were going to go... But I have definitely provided lots of entertainment along the way...And I'm pretty sure I still do! 

So, to answer the question above, once I opened my eyes and saw everyone that was in my corner and cheering me on, I knew I would be successful.  I just had no idea how much I would be changing in such a short amount of time.  For me, a lot of this came down to finding a person I could really trust.  I was talking with my co-workers this week and they were saying how they've never gotten an impression of me being quiet or uncomfortable with people I don't know.  I told them that it is really hard for me to trust people.  I've been torn apart so many times in my life in so many ways that I've had to learn how to repair a lot of those scars that are still really visible.  At least to me.  But, I am my own worst critic.  However, I've come so far in the last year and I can only see amazing things ahead of me.  Every day I am a little more willing to put myself out there in ways I never would have even considered before.  I think that is just one thing that proves how much I've changed and grown over the last year.  

So, I was finally willing to fix what was broken inside of me.  And I was finally ready to accept help from one of the most wonderful people I've ever met.  That's why I knew I would find success this time.

What was different last year?  

Short and sweet - last year I didn't believe in myself or that anyone cared much about me.  I've had to come out of that hole that I was in.  Part of that is writing this blog and sharing my story.  If I can help just one person, then I feel like I will have accomplished a goal.  I'd love to help many more.  But I'll start with one.  

What's different now?

I kind of touched on this above.  But, it really is about the people who are in my life these days.  My family, friends (Renee'), co-workers, and many others.  Every day they help me grow a little bit more.  Become a little more comfortable with myself.  And be a little more willing to put myself out there each and every day.  Every single one of you have an impact on my life every day and have helped me become the person I've always known was inside of me.  I love seeing new pieces of it every day.  

The people who are around you in your daily life truly do make a huge impact on who you are as a person.  Make sure you surround yourself with positive people.  I'm so thankful I do.  

Your life is your message to the world.  Make sure it's inspiring.