2013 - A Year in Review - Part 1

If you've read my blog, you pretty much know my whole story up until now.  So, I'll try to not bore you too much with another recap.  But, I wanted to do a year in review in another way.  The best I've been able to come up with is a month by month of my feelings throughout the year.  And any special events or achievements that I remember.  I think it is a great way to show people who may not know me real well how much of a transformation I've achieved this year.  This idea kinda came to me while I was making my Christmas card and a present for a friend.  I think it might also be fun to include pictures of myself throughout the year.  Some of these will be repeats because I don't have a lot of pictures of myself from earlier in the year.  But, I think it really shows my transformation, inside and out.  This might get a little long so I'll divide it in two parts. Here goes nothing!

January - Feeling so down I didn't even know where to go.  This picture was from a "slumber party" I had with my niece and nephew.  At that point, this was the only thing that was making me smile.  Chloe is holding a water bottle I gave her and she looks so little and young.  Guess she's changed a lot too!  Cooper is just as adorable as ever.

I went back and looked at a calendar and this picture was taken on January 24th.  I showed up at my parents house, looked at Cooper and realized we were dressed completely alike.  I thought it would be fun to take a picture.  The date is significant because I had just come from meeting with Renee' for the first time.  I never thought this would become a "before" picture.  No matter how positive I felt after meeting with her, in my wildest dreams I couldn't have imagined where I would be by the end of the year.

February - I couldn't find any pictures of myself from February but this was taken at the end of January so it will have to do.  Where was I in February?  Beginning to see a light at the end of the tunnel.  Other than my family, not many people knew that I was trying to lose weight and do some different things with my life.  I could say I just wanted to keep it to myself.  But, deep down, I think I was worried about failing again and didn't want people to judge me.  Not that anyone ever really judged me but, again, that was my mindset a year ago.  I was also getting lost in the grocery store week after week.  I should have taken a video of that :)  I was working out as much as I could during a busy month at work and beginning to see how much better I felt just by taking some time for myself.  And, I was seeing results.  I was losing weight.  

March - I can honestly say that by the time March hit I was starting to see a new me emerge.  With me, this would take awhile.  I'm not sure I can hit all the highlights because it is such a busy month, but I'll try.  One of the first, best moments was this day (I believe it was March 2nd):

While I may not look much different, by this point I had lost 18 pounds and, as I got ready for my nephew's birthday party, I looked in my closet and decided to put on a pair of jeans that hadn't fit in a long time.  I just wanted to see if I could get them on.  Imagine my surprise when they actually zipped without a problem!  If I had been allowed to jump, I would have!  I told Renee' and she called me and was so happy for me.  She helped me figure out how I was going to get through being surrounded by pizza and cake (I'd avoided it up to this point) and I felt empowered.  Both because of the conversation and because of the jeans :)

This picture was taken at a birthday celebration for my sister-in-law.  As I've said before, our birthdays are 10 days apart.  There were a couple of people at their house, we had some drinks, played games and just hung out.  It was great.  And even better for me - they included my name on the cookie cake :)  I had a small piece but resisted the urge to eat more throughout the night.  I remember feeling happy.  Especially when my brother told me he could tell that I had lost weight.  Although I had lost a little over 20 pounds at this point, I was still having trouble seeing it in myself.  So, to hear it from him meant the world to me.

The other parts of March were my birthday and Easter.  I've already written about a lot of it but, in a nutshell, the week of my birthday was a huge turning point for me in so many ways.  To have someone brag to other people about what I've accomplished, really feel like Renee' and I had and would continue to have a great friendship, spend a whole day with my mama, just me and her and so many other things was more than I could have ever hoped for.  

April - I really started to see a difference in myself.  I think my favorite part of the month was cleaning out my closet.  I usually pack away all my winter clothes but, this year, I was instructed to give them away.  They were already getting too big and I actually believed I wasn't going to be fitting back into them next year.  Then I started trying dresses on to see what I should keep for all of the end of the school year celebrations.  Here's a picture of one of those dresses - I'm not the best at selfies but...

The other part of April that was fun (eventually) was first going to a workout with Renee'.  I couldn't believe (at first) that she wanted to include me given how much she'd have to modify everything for me.  I remember when I realized that didn't matter to her, that she just wanted me to come, I felt another little boost in my self-confidence.  I think she knew (and still knows) that little things like that make a difference to me.  I was starting to find some happiness.

May - What a month!  For the first time in a few years, I had agreed to walk in the Flying Pig Half-Marathon with my mom.  13.1 miles.  What was I thinking?  That's what I thought when I was getting up before the crack of dawn.  But, the weather cooperated and we finished in under 4 hours which was my goal all along.  It was fun to spend that time with my mom and I was beginning to see what I am capable of.  Other than being tired, I felt pretty good throughout the entire walk.  Well, I was hungry, but that's because, by that point I had gotten used to eating every couple of hours.  That was when I realized I had really changed my eating habits and that eating every couple of hours is really the best way to go.

In the middle of the month, my nephew graduated from preschool.  This picture was taken that night and, when I looked at it, I really saw a difference in my face.  People started saying that I looked happy and I was actually feeling happy.  

Over Memorial Day Weekend, we had decided to get together and reminisce about old times with pictures and stuff.  Kind of a fun extra celebration of my parents' 60th birthdays.  So, that Saturday was a gorgeous day.  While the guys played golf, the girls took the kids to the park.  I had so much energy and loved running around with them.  I couldn't even tell you the last time that happened.  Actually, it's probably never happened.  I was hanging on the playground equipment, swinging and just having fun.  I felt a freedom I hadn't felt in a very long time.  I was even starting to see a difference in my body.  Fun picture from that day:

I don't think I have a picture from the day it happened but, the other thing that made May so unbelievably memorable was that, the last Thursday of the month, I stepped on the scale and I had officially lost 50 pounds!  I literally couldn't believe it.  I think I cried a little bit.  I had gone from 281 to 231 in 4 months.  I wasn't quite at my next goal yet but I knew it would be happening sooner rather than later.  My confidence was growing in ways I couldn't believe.

June - For anyone who works in education, this is definitely the greatest month of the year!  The school year was coming to an end and I was so excited to see what the summer held for me.  Little did I know all the surprises that were in store for me.  I was teaching swim lessons a couple of nights a week and one of the first things I noticed was that I could actually just use my arms to hop out of the pool.  I couldn't do that last year.  All along, it's been the little things.  Like being comfortable in a pair of shorts (see below).  Couldn't tell you the last time I wore a pair in public.  

By mid- June, while hard to believe, I was still losing weight.  I think it was the 3rd week of the month when I hit my next goal.  58 pounds.  Seriously!!!????!!!  I didn't know what to do.  I hadn't seen Renee' in over a month so I sent her this picture so she could see what all of her help was turning into :)

Also, I had applied for a new job.  I was keeping it pretty quiet but, deep down, I was so excited at the possibilities of what could be ahead of me.  By the end of the month, I had been on this journey to change my life for 5 months and I was amazed at how it just felt like everything was falling into place.

As you go through the pictures of the first 6 months, I hope you see not only the physical changes, but also the change in my smile.  It started to become genuine, not forced.  I can't begin to explain how amazing that feels.

We delight in the beauty of the butterfly but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty 

- Maya Angelou

Stay tuned for Part 2 :)

Figuring Out Why It All Happened

"Sometimes you fall down because there is something down there that you are supposed to find"

I can't even begin to explain how true this is for me.  I have fallen down more times than I can count.  In fact, I think there has been more than one period of time where I feel like I just kept falling every day.

This is kind of a continuation of my previous entry but I really believe I was at my lowest point ten months ago.  But, in conversations I've had with my family, there was definitely a reason I got to that point.  I think it is because I was supposed to finally figure out that people exist in the world who wanted to help me.  That there are people out there who want to be my friend simply because I'm me.  Not because of who my brother and sister are.  That's not meant to be mean (and I don't think they would take it that way).  I love my brother and sister more than anything.  They are my best friends.  But, for years and years, I never thought anyone wanted to be my friend unless they knew me through them.  Didn't think I was important.  I think that's why I talked about them so much to other people.  It was all I knew.  The good part?  Now I talk about myself.  And I enjoy it!

Many of you know, I am not good at patting myself on the back.  But, I also think that, maybe, I got to where I was at so I could go on the adventure I've been on in the last 10 months.  

I've met people I never would have met and done things I never would have done if I had stayed curled up in my little comfort zone (aka, my bubble). I've had conversations with people I never in a million years would have had a year ago.  I definitely think my "Bubble" is getting bigger.  Maybe someone poked some holes in it!  While I am still super quiet around groups of people I don't know real well, every day I get a little better.  One of the biggest things I notice - my face doesn't get red when I answer questions.  I'm not embarrassed when people look at me.  I am so much more comfortable with being in the middle of group.  As long as I don't have to say much. ;)

The best thing I found at the bottom of the hole that I brought out with me?  My sense of humor and my ability to laugh at anything and everything.  For the most part, I'd always been a pretty happy person who enjoyed laughing.  Somewhere, somehow, I lost that.  Finding it has been one of the greatest blessings of my life.  If I can't laugh at myself, who will?

The other part of the reason I think I was meant to fall so far down?  I love helping people.  So, maybe I was that far down so I could help other people who are in the same position.  I've noticed that, since figuring all this out about myself, I am so much better equipped to help my students on a regular basis.  I focus so much better on them.  I'm not so uber-focused on myself and dwelling on all that's wrong in my life.  I don't even let much bother me anymore.  I am so much calmer than I ever thought possible.  I never thought that would happen.  Guess that's a side benefit to finding happiness in my life.  

I've had so many people tell me how inspiring my journey is to them.  I still find that strange in some ways but at the same time it makes me feel like I have another purpose in this world.  Renee' has done so much for me, I definitely want to pay if forward in any way I can.  I love telling my story because it shows people it's possible to accomplish the craziest of goals if you find a place to start.  And find someone to believe in you.

Looking back on all of this, I am actually happy I fell down.  

If you don't get lost, there's a chance you may never be found.

In a nutshell - I found self-esteem.  I found self-confidence.  And I found myself.  And it's unbelievable.

It's Been Quite a Year... Well, Almost!

I can't even begin to describe the last (almost) year of my life.  Amazing, Inspiring (to me), Unbelievable, Life Changing, just to name a few ways I feel about the last 10 months.  

I've written a little bit about how I felt in January of 2013.  But I'll give you a little more insight.  My mom knew how much I was struggling and I know after our difficult conversation in early January, she finally knew how much I needed to feel like I matter to her and the rest of my family.  So, she told me we were going to spend the day together on MLK day.  I was so excited!  Just me and mom.  We saw a hilarious movie and were planning to stop at Panera and hang out for a bit on the way home.  Unfortunately, there was a horrible car accident that shut down most of the highway early that morning.  We thought it would be cleared up by the time the movie ended but it wasn't.  So, we ended up sitting in the car for almost 2 hours to travel a total of about 5 miles back to my house.  However, I think that 2 hours was just as important as any other time we spend together.  We talked some more but, I wasn't sobbing the whole time.  I was going into a little more detail with her about how I felt, why certain things were bringing me down so much, etc.  I don't remember a lot of the exact details of the conversation but the one thing I remember clearly is saying this to my mom - "I'm tired of being sad all the time".  She reassured me that I would figure it all out and she would be there to support me in any way she could and that I wanted her to.  I told her that, while I was nervous, I was also excited to meet Renee' later that week.  

I kind of already wrote about this way back at the beginning of my blog but, to I'll try to describe it a little more to you.  The day I met Renee', it was freezing cold outside.  I got a little turned around trying to find the facility (if you've read about my adventures at the grocery store, this shouldn't surprise you..) but I eventually found it.  And I wasn't late.  That's achievement for me!  I'm usually at least 5 minutes late to everything.  Renee' probably doesn't know this.  Unless she was watching me from the window.  But I think she probably had better things to do!  I stood at the door for a couple of minutes trying to get up the courage to go in.  I had no idea who I was meeting or what I was walking into.  That used to be extremely frightening for me.  Okay, it still is, but I'm getting better!  

One of her trainers showed me where her office was and while I was expecting to shake her hand, she stood up and gave me a hug.  Put me right at ease.  I needed that.  Immediately, I felt like our conversation just flowed.  She asked me questions and I wasn't scared to answer them or elaborate on my answers.  Those who know me are probably thinking, no way, Amanda hates talking to new people.  More or less, they would have been right.  But there was something different about Renee'.  I've teased her about sprinkling some kind of magic dust on me but, overall, I think I just trusted her from very early on.  I know we talked for at least 40 minutes.  The time just flew by.

I couldn't believe that just 3 days ago I had been sitting in a car telling my mom that I was tired of being sad all the time.  I was still struggling.  I would for awhile and still have my moments.  But I finally saw a light at the end of the tunnel.  

What you hear all the time is so true - Anything is possible - just find a place to start.  Learning how to smile again and be happy is the best thing that's happened to me in the last 10 months.  Yes, losing 94 pounds isn't too shabby.  But, the biggest gift I've been given and achievement I have is how much I've grown on the inside.  

Strength and growth come only through continuous effort and struggle - Napoleon Hill

I never would have said this last year at this time but I truly believe this now:

Challenges are what make life interesting.  Overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.

Keep trying - you'll get there - I promise!

Emotional Eating and Me

How did I get to 281 pounds?  Well, I love food.  Maybe a little too much.  Especially sweets.  And pasta.  And anything greasy.  Okay, I just love food.  But, I took it a step further.  I am a huge emotional eater.  Some people refer to themselves as stress eaters.  While I know that definitely exists, emotional eating is definitely a step up the ladder.  Emotional Eating is "eating to feed a feeling, and not a growling stomach".  

The best way I can define the feeling eating gave to me is to link it to the way exercise now makes me feel.  It is a release.  I used to feel empowered when I ate.  Now I feel a burst of energy when I exercise.  And I know I am dealing with daily stress in a much healthier way.

When you're happy, you eat.  When you're sad, you eat.  When you're stressed, you eat.  The list goes on and on for those of us who are emotional eaters.  Whenever something would happen, good or bad, I would grab some kind of food.  At work, if I was having a bad day, I would go in search of chocolate.  I rarely kept it in my office but someone always had some.  Momentarily, it made me feel better.  But it usually led to my eating more than just one piece.  

As I've said before I live alone.  It's so easy to lie to myself about what I'm eating when there's no one watching.  I had a couple of co-workers ask me this week (after they saw my Christmas card), what did you used to eat?  I answered with, pretty much anything I didn't need to.  Every week, I bought a few bags of candy at the store and I can almost guarantee that by the end of the week they would all be gone.  Of course I would lie to myself and say, I only had a couple of pieces.  I wish!  Then there was the graeter's ice cream, cookies, donuts, etc.  You name it, I ate it.  And I bought it at the grocery store.  Eating made me feel less alone.  And less bored.  As my clothes got tighter, it got harder to walk up the stairs, I got sick more often, etc., I got more depressed.  I just didn't know what to do so I kept eating.  It got to a point where I stopped getting on the scale.  I would squeeze into clothes and pretend that I was okay with the way I looked.  And felt.  

Last year at Christmas was probably the saddest and most down I've ever felt.  I remember it was Christmas night, everyone else had left my parents house and I was getting ready to leave.  And I started crying.  I tried to hide it from my mom but she knows me too well.  She asked me what was wrong and I said I'm not sure but I'll be fine.  I was taking their dog with me for a few days as they were heading out of town with my sister and her family.  Deep down, I was jealous.  And that whole feeling of not mattering to anyone was at the surface.  I tried to push it down again but it was getting to a point where there wasn't anywhere left to hide it. 

I remember spending most of my Christmas break by myself, hanging out with the dog.   And eating.  I lived for the moments I spent with my niece, nephew, brother and sister-in-law.  My nephew even spent the night with me for the first time and it was the highlight of my break.  My sister and everyone else got home on New Year's Eve and she called to see if I wanted to come hang out.  I knew my mom had told her about Christmas and I told her not to feel guilty.  That was my mindset a year ago.  I never thought anyone would want to do anything nice for me or just because.  I ended up going to her house and hanging out for the night.   It was the other highlight of my break.  

As I went back to work, I just couldn't get past how down I felt.  I wasn't feeling very good but it was like I was looking to be sick so I could just go home.  By Friday, I ended up leaving work early.  I really wasn't feeling good but it was an easy excuse to lock myself up in my house and sleep.  And eat.  

We all express our emotions in our own ways.  I used to express mine by stuffing my face with food.  The funny thing is, I don't really remember when that changed.  Although I will say that having someone hold me accountable for what I put in my mouth has been a key to this journey for me.  Also the fact that she is my friend and will give me alternatives to try or tell me funny anecdotes (such as, "Pizza looks like an old man's face with zits" or "donuts look like oversized ears").  Yes, these are actual messages we've sent back and forth.  And they make me laugh on a regular basis.

Sometimes, I wish I could have figured all of this out sooner. But, I really believe it took me this long for several reasons.  Some of which I probably don't even know yet.   I'm still learning and growing.  And I hope to continue to do so every day.

My friend Kim took a picture of me last night and I think it just shows what happiness looks like on me - Personally, I think it looks great! :)

Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood - Helen Keller

Trusting Myself - And Others

Learning to trust is one of life's most difficult tasks.

I used to trust everyone and everything.  Most people would probably call me naive.  I think I just always wanted to see the best in other people.  Don't get me wrong, I still look for the good in others, in just takes me awhile to trust them completely.

I could probably take this issue all the way back to my teenage years.  As I've mentioned in previous blogs, I wasn't the most social kid in the world.  Heck, I'm not a really social adult.  But, as a teenager, I never found a place where I fit in.  I tried to be so much like the people I thought I should be friends with that I never really found a place for myself.  I wasn't athletic, I wasn't artsy and I just wasn't sure where I fit in.  I trusted a lot of people and they ended up turning their backs on me in a lot of different ways.  Now, of course I realize that this all part of being a teenager as well as just growing pains.  But, in a way, it was a little different for me.  I never really found that core group of friends that I went through school with.  Even in high school and college.

I really thought when I started my first real job that a lot of this trouble trusting people would disappear.  It did for a little while.  But, as different things started to happen, I really had trouble trusting some of the people I spent the most time with.  That may sound harsh, and I won't go into detail, but let's just say that, sometimes, being really nice and helpful and always willing to do more than my part bit me in the butt more than once.  But I just kept trying.  I don't think I realized the negative effect it was having on my self-esteem.  I had a few friends that I really trusted and would tell things to but, sometimes its difficult to enjoy working with people when you don't trust them.  Most of the time I put on a good show, but overall, it was very difficult for me and a big reason why I turned to food for comfort time and again.  

When my mom confronted me with all of this at the beginning of the year, I think I finally cried all of the tears I've needed to cry for so long.  All of the emotion that I kept locked up inside myself for so long finally came to the surface.  I remember, for a couple of days, I kinda felt like a zombie.  In some ways, I was relieved.  In others, I was scared because I had no idea where to go.

I've probably written a little about this before so I'll try to not repeat myself.  In a nutshell, trusting new people has been a huge issue for me for more years than I count.  That's probably why I struggle to meet new people and make new friends.  I often question motives and have to feel people out before I'll open up, even a little bit.

When I met Renee', I'm sure I did a little of that.  The idea for this blog entry came from a conversation I had with her this week.  She doesn't know that but it's okay ;)  I'm not sure what I was looking for but I must have found it.  Almost immediately I would say thank you and she'd tell me to stop, that she was looking forward to establishing a friendship with me.  Huh?  I didn't know what to do with that at first except smile and look forward to talking / texting / emailing with her.  Still took me a couple months to stop saying thank you all the time (I only say it a little bit now).  She answered all my stupid questions (and still does) and really took the time to get to know me.  She broke down all the walls that I had built up around myself.  She made me see that there are people in the world that I can trust and I don't have to question the motives of everyone around me.  

Without all of the time and effort she put into pulling me out of my "hole" I wouldn't have applied for my current job.  I am so lucky to be working in a field that I love with amazing co-workers that I knew I could trust from the moment I met them.  Most of that is because they are just amazing people.  The rest of it is because Renee' finally got me to stop questioning myself all the time.  Don't get me wrong, I still question things at times but I am probably the most relaxed version of myself I can remember in recent history.  Or probably the last 20 years.  

I've said before that I don't know how Renee' has gotten me to do 90% of the things I've done this year.  But, like I told her this week, it's actually pretty simple.  I trust her.  And that's a word I don't throw around easily.  I'm so lucky to have her as a friend.  Although I haven't even known her a year, it's hard for me to remember my life without her friendship.

Looking at all of these "bad" things with fresh eyes, while they weren't ideal or fair, it's just the way my life turned out and it has led me to where I am today.  These experiences play a huge role in how I am able to relate to many different people and experiences they are having that they might be struggling with.  

Trust is a hard thing to establish, earn and keep with lots of different aspects of your life.  But, once you figure it out, it's one of the best gifts you can give yourself.

Trust yourself, you know more than you think you do.

Another Update on My Life :)

The only journey is the journey within

Again, I feel like it's been awhile since I wrote an update on my story.  It still boggles my mind that people are interested but it's so fun for me so, thank you so much for reading!

I really believe journey is accurate word to describe what I've been doing and what I'm currently doing with my life.  No one can make these changes for me.  If I'm going to do this, I have to do it myself.  And my journey isn't the same as anyone else's adventure through life.  We are all unique.  When I look back on the transformation I've made in the last 10 months, I just can't even remember the person I used to be.  There's this picture that was sent to me by a family friend.  It was hard for me to even look at it.  But, I will post it here to show everyone what you can truly accomplish if you set your mind to something.  The top half is from December 2012 and the bottom half is from the end of November of 2013.

Over the last couple of weeks, I've taken my nephew on a train ride, decorated my Christmas tree and done lots of other fun things.  Know what?  It's a lot easier to carry all the Christmas decorations upstairs with 90+ less pounds on my body!  I decided I wanted to make a sweet potato dish for Thanksgiving.  I did a trial run the Sunday before and I was amazed at how well it turned out.  Of course, the recipe wasn't that complicated but everyone who ate it said they were really good which made me so happy.  Maybe this whole cooking thing is only a few years away... :)

The day before Thanksgiving my mom and I always go shopping for Christmas presents.  We've never been Black Friday shoppers but we really enjoy going on Wednesday.  It was amazing to me how much more energy I had as we kept going from store to store.  We had a blast and I loved spending time with her.

Anytime there is a lot of food around, I always get a little concerned.  But, for some reason, I wasn't overly concerned about Thanksgiving.  I think I knew I was going to indulge some and, that's okay.  But, I didn't go crazy with the snacks and stuff and I only had one helping at dinner.  I even ate dessert!  I enjoyed every bite but resisted the urge to bring any home with me :)  It's all about making the right choices for yourself.

On Friday afternoon I decided to go out and do a little shopping once the crowds died down.  I ended up at Old Navy where the entire store was 50% off.  I decided to try on a pair of skinny jeans...which I've never worn before.  I couldn't believe it when I put them on - they actually looked good!  I was so excited that I didn't know what to do with myself so I just kept smiling!

The rest of the weekend was fun, I went to an anniversary party and did my best with food.  I also watched my niece and nephew for a few hours on Sunday and we had a blast as usual.  I love being a part of their lives.

Going back to work after a few days off is never easy, for anyone.  But, I can honestly say, this year, for the first time in a few years, it wasn't bad.  I was looking forward to seeing my co-workers and getting another week started.  Absolutely unbelievable what can happen when you love your job and work with such fun people!  They are all amazing at their jobs but know how to have fun, which I enjoy more than I think anyone knows.

I have been going to Boot Camp and it's been so much fun.  Within the last 2 weeks I've only lost a pound but I'm okay with it.  As I get smaller, I know I am going to continue slow down with the weight loss, so I've gotta find some other goals :)

Just for fun - Here's a picture of me in my skinny jeans :)

 

There is only one person who could ever make you happy, and that person is you.

I can't believe how true this is - and I love it!

Happiness Is...

I went to a party on Saturday night and it was amazing to me how many people told me how happy I look.  They said you could see the happiness in my smile and my eyes.  When I look at pictures of myself I can see what they mean.  I've wondered if other people can see it.  To hear right from their mouths, without any prompting, that they can was the best feeling.  So, I thought that might be a good topic for my next entry in my blog.  It is December, the month of the year when we celebrate being happy and enjoy time with family and friends.  So, while I'm sure some of this will be a little silly and might be a little similar to my thankful list, here's what makes me happy:

My nieces and nephew.
Christmas (decorations, music, etc)
Exercise (as long as I'm not sore the next day)
Friendly cashiers
Sales & 30% off coupons at Kohl's
Orange Leaf frozen yogurt
Birthdays
Losing 1/2, 1, 2, 3 lbs or any amount of weight every week
Becoming friends with people who believe in me in ways I never believed in myself
My nieces and mom singing songs for the family
Watching Christmas Vacation to kick off my holiday movie season
Buying Christmas presents for other people
Any meal that doesn't require me to cook
Sliding into a size 12 jeans.
Knowing a size 10 isn't too far off
Getting so much positive feedback from so many people from all walks of life.
Hearing that people enjoy reading my blog
Anytime I get to eat peanut butter
Constantly cleaning out my closet because clothes are getting too big.
Looking at my life and realizing that, in the last 10 months I've changed my life in more ways I could have ever imagined. Thanks to my friend - even though she won't take credit :)  Here's the proof:

Spending time with my family
Annual family vacations to the beach
Realizing that being happy is infectious and can totally rub off on those around you.  Just as someone else's good mood can influence me in so many wonderful ways!
Seeing the world through the eyes of my nieces and nephew.  Their innocence is the greatest gift!

And so much more that I can't think of at the moment :)

A couple of thoughts on being happy:

The most important thing is to enjoy your life - to be happy - it's all that matters - Audrey Hepburn

Happiness never decreases by being shared.